SERMON: “Women (and Men) Who Disciple” (Titus 2:4–5)
“Women
(and Men) Who Disciple”
(Titus 2:4–5)
Series: “Together in Discipleship” #6 Text:
Titus 2:4–5
By: Shaun Marksbury Date: May
10, 2026
Venue: Living Water Baptist Church Occasion:
PM Service
Introduction
I don’t always interrupt where we are for holidays,
but this Mother’s Day falls at a time where we are considering discipleship as
a church. Last year, we announced that
we would be starting a care group ministry, and after a few delays, we finally
have that started. We also have a discipleship
program that we’re beginning very soon for every member of this church that wants
to take advantage of it.
With Mother’s Day upon us, that got me
thinking about the importance of women being involved in this process. There are mothers, grandmothers, and
spiritual mothers among us — women who have poured out their lives for the next
generation. The greatest gift a mother
can give is not biological life, but the spiritual nurture that shapes souls
for eternity. In the church and in the
home, God has designed women to play a vital role in discipleship.
Of course, men are important, too. This passage follows
instructions for elders and older men within the church. Yet, though church elders or pastors as
essential, those preaching and ministering, there’s only so much that they can
do. Discipleship is something in which
the whole church should be involved. Older
saints must step up and pour into the younger, and those with knowledge and who
are spiritual can restore those who fall.
As such, it’s important that church elders empower older congregants so
they can help in church discipleship, and that includes women.
There are many ways in which older women can teach and disciple
younger women, and the church must encourage this multi-generational
discipleship. Understand that this happens
first in the home, with the teaching of children, and then it even ripples out
into the church. Two examples of this
are Lois and Eunice — Timothy’s grandmother and mother — who passed sincere
faith to him long before Paul ever met him (2 Tim. 1:5). Such women are not pastors, but they are
discipling others.
Discipleship is an essential area of ministry within the
church. It is something I would love to
see more of in our church, and I would love to talk to you about ways in which
you could disciple others. Of course, if
you’re not being discipled right now, we would also love to talk to you about
ways in which that can happen here.
I want to encourage every woman here to embrace this Titus 2
calling, including even the men (your role in discipleship is equally vital,
cf. vv. 6–8). Since this is Mother’s
Day, though, I want to especially nudge and exhort the women of the church: the
next generation needs you. And if we
neglect this calling, the consequences are serious — idleness, gossip, busybody
behavior, and even the introduction of false teaching (see 1 Tim. 5:13).
So, let’s see what this discipleship looks like and why it
matters so much. In these next two
verses, we see six ways in which older women are to teach the younger, a model
of discipling the next generation. Women
disciple the next generation 1.) to think wisely, 2.) to love their families,
3.) to work at home, 4.) to be kind, 5.) to be subject, and 6.) to honor God’s
Word. Let’s consider the first of these.
First, Women Disciple the Next Generation to Think Wisely
(v. 4a, 5ab)
so that they may instruct
the young women in sensibility… to be sensible, pure
Let’s begin by considering who these young women are. The word here is a feminine form of “new,”
and given the context, we would understand this to mean newly married. In the ancient world, because of health
reasons, this tended to be a younger age (in the mid to later teens). The exact age isn’t as important as the
general station in life — these are young women, perhaps leaving the home for
the first time or having only recently moved out, entering into marriage and
needing some advice. So, according to v.
3, older women are to teach good things by encouraging the younger women;
perhaps they are also new converts, meaning that this isn’t simply a job for
their unbelieving mothers.
Yet, the word is more than “encourage” (as the NASB has); it’s
“instruct.” The ESV uses “train.” The Greek word means “to make sane or sober-minded, to recall a person to his senses,” hence
“to moderate, chasten, discipline.” [1] The Reformation Study Bible
says this is to “bring them to their senses.”
There are many issues younger women and men simply haven’t thought
through, like how they deal with pressure and conflict, to management of money,
temptations, cultural wind shifts, emotions, and more. Older women must instruct younger women in
right or wise thinking.
Part of this might
be the acquiring of biblical knowledge. While
hopefully the younger ladies in the church learn about Scripture and theology from
childhood, they may have missed a few lessons.
Moreover, they may have only learned some truths in the abstract and
never learned how to apply the knowledge of Scripture in a practical way. There also may be certain gray areas never addressed
in general teachings that requires discipleship to teach how to apply
Scripture. So, the older needs to
instruct “in sensibility.”
That’s related to
the term in v. 5, which is why we’re skipping straight to there. The next generation must learn “to be sensible.”
Both men and women must learn how to
develop and cultivate a sober mind, a sense of self-control. Our younger people must be able to think
through issues and not become slaves to their emotions. The pressures of marriage, for instance, can
expose areas of immaturity in the thinking of both spouses; does the younger
woman gossip about her husband to her friends, or does she talk to a
spiritually mature woman who can help her?
The need for sensible discipleship in sensibility is why we need women
who are even capable to conduct biblical counseling.
Before we leave
this thought of wise thinking, consider also the word “pure.” This is sometimes translated as “holy.” Women with right thinking are not like ships
tossed by the waves of temptations.
There are many women who fantasize about other men or different life
situations (like having more money), and they grow discontent. They may also get drawn in by false teaching
or false promises, placing their hope in the wrong places. So, they know what they need and, just as
importantly, what they don’t need. They
think and plan in a godly manner with a pure heart.
Godly young women must behave sensibly or moderately, not wanting God’s Word reviled through their
lives. Discipleship helps
accomplish that. More than that, it helps
cultivate a proper love within the family, bringing us to our next point. To see it, let’s back up a bit to see the
rest of v. 4.
Second, Women Disciple the Next Generation to Love Their
Families (v. 4b)
to love their
husbands, to love their children,
Some believe a bit of a myth based on Ephesians 5 — husbands
are to love their wives, and wives are only to respect their
husbands. It is true that husbands need
respect from their wives, and disrespect can drive a wedge into the
relationship. However, God also commands
her to love her husband!
Remember that there are different words for love in the
Greek. This term is a phileō love. Some feminists have a hatred for men
(misandry), and some married women might, because of the fall, desire to usurp
their husbands. This term is the
opposite of that: philandry, a love for a man (not to be confused with
the modern definition of “philander”). To
bring this back around to the point, discipleship requires us to be
countercultural, opposing the spirit of the age, with the older instructing younger
women to desire marriage and to love their husbands.
Older women teach how to cultivate an affectionate
love,[2] a “commitment
of a woman to her husband’s welfare.”[3] She should be concerned with what he needs
and even desires (just as he should for her).
There’s advice for men in the “manosphere” to never open up to women because
they will despise you for it; that should never be the case in the Christian church. Though some women want only to receive and
don’t care if their husbands have needs, wise women in the church must come
around younger women and tell them that they are not princesses — they must
show affection and care for their husbands.
The same is true of their children. Paul uses the same word; women are to have
both a philandry and a philtekney (if that’s a word) — a love for
husbands and a love for children. While
this seems obvious, some women suffer from post-partum depression, or they were
abused as children and struggle with the notion of being mothers, requiring intensive
discipleship and care. Moreover, it
seems that natural love in our culture has grown cold, which we see most
pointedly in abortion.
Lack of love for children isn’t new. Consider this comment from a theologian in
1930: “This exhortation is still needed where some married women prefer
poodle-dogs to children.”[4] Today, there are various trends on social
media about people who want to be “child-free,” with several couples bragging
that they are “DINKs” (“double-income, no kids”). These are couples who reveal in the money
they have for themselves, their ability to buy what they want and go on
vacations. Some have too great a love
for self to also have a love for child.
So, older women should help younger women to see that
children are a blessing from the Lord (Psa. 127:3). They will have to help them in specific ways
— sometimes, even well-meaning mothers can do too much, and must learn the
value in letting the child cry and not be a helicopter. Other times, they may need to be motivated to
put their phones down and pick up the child.
And, some of the lessons they learn can be taught in turn to the
children themselves, just as we see modeled in Lois and Eunice. Just as we noted with husbands, women must
show affection and care for their babies and children.
Some will see that this requires a lot of time at home. This is correct. And that leads us to the next point:
Third, Women Disciple the Next Generation to Work at Home
(v. 5c)
workers at home,
Here, we step into a bit of controversy. The Greek word here literally means “one who
works in the home,” coming from the words for “house” and “work.” This is why the HCSB and the NKJV have “homemakers”
here, because it’s sometimes said that husbands build houses while wives make
homes. This is a specific way a woman
shows care and affection for her husband and children, but some have wondered how
far this term goes.
Unfortunately, some Christians have made a law here where
there is no law. This word doesn’t imprison
a woman to four drywalls, forbidding her any duties beyond cooking, cleaning,
and childcare. Scripture shows this is
not the case; the so-called Proverbs 31 woman participates in commerce, for
instance. In the West, before the
industrial revolution and urbanization, women worked and provided for their
families, even while the husband does the lion’s share of work outside the
home. Scripture doesn’t command a woman
to never work outside the home.
Yet, it does command her to also work within the
home, something industrious women might neglect. A godly woman is primarily focused on, as 1 Timothy
5:14 says, keeping house or managing their households. Her high and holy calling expresses worship of
the Lord in action, reflecting His image, as the Lord fashions a home for us. This blessing transfers to the greater church;
as women can transform a church building into a community, helping to build a church
home for all the people of God.
To be honest, men need women at home. The Reformer and former bachelor Martin
Luther, recalled, “Before I was married, the bed was not made for a whole year
and became foul with sweat. But I worked
so hard and was so weary I tumbled in without noticing.” I wonder whether Katharina von Bora washed or
burned his bedding after they were wed!
Men don’t make good homemakers on average.
Again, this isn’t to say that women are not to ever work
outside the home, and it is necessary for many in our current economy. This also isn’t to say men shouldn’t help
with the chores — we certainly can and should.
However, just as men have the primary responsibility to work and
provide, she has the primary responsibility of the work of the home. In fact, men should strive to ensure wives
can live out the Word of God to the best of their abilities.
When that happens, women can make a warm home. That means she will also work on her personal
deportment, which brings us to the next point:
Fourth, Women Disciple the Next Generation to Be Kind
(v. 5d)
kind,
This can also just mean “good.” This “would indicate a lack of irritability
in light of the nagging demands of mundane and routine household duties.”[5] She should not become the like the dripping
of a faucet (cf. Prov. 27:15) or who drives her husband to the corner of a roof
with her contentious behavior (21:9; 25:24).
While there are times when men need reality checks, there are women who are
too eager to give them out because they indulge in sinful anger.
This means that they should also learn to be kind to others
outside of their family, choosing their words with tact and discretion. Christian women are to be generally tenderhearted,
which comes from this place of having right thinking and right love in
place. The loving mother “opens her
mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” (Prov.
31:26). This is difficult for some women
who, perhaps like Martha, are more task-oriented than people-oriented. But a Christ-exalting love for others leads
to kind and tenderhearted dealings.
This is why discipleship is so essential. Husbands can help in this area, too. Yet, the stress and of life may tempt younger
women to want to rebel. That’s why she
must also learn this point:
Fifth, Women Disciple the Next Generation to Be Subject
(v. 5e)
being subject to
their own husbands,
As long as we’re stepping into controversy, we might as well
get both feet wet! This is the same
restriction as we read in Colossians 3:18, “Wives, be subject to your husbands,
as is fitting in the Lord.” Also,
Ephesians 5:22 — “Wives, be subject
to your own husbands, as to the Lord” (same word in v. 21 there). Peter similarly says, “you wives, be
submissive to your own husbands” (1 Peter 3:1).
This is why the word “obey” is in the bride’s traditional wedding vows
(and yes, I do read that part in wedding ceremonies!).
What does this mean, though?
It’s important to qualify that Scripture doesn’t say “women are less
competent than men, even in ruling or teaching.”[6] Some believe that, because Eve was deceived,
women are more gullible, but Paul simply uses this fact to state that women are
to remain within their roles (cf. 1 Tim. 2:14–15). If she really needed guidance like a child,
then all these verses would say she is to be subject to all men rather than just
to her own husband. This is simply
referring to how the dynamics of decision-making would take place within a
typical marriage.
Of course, that won’t make the feminists and egalitarians
happy, but that’s not our goal. There’s
nothing inherently degrading in her subjection to her husband. After all, Eve was to be in submission to
Adam as his equal before the fall, and God the Son came to earth and
practiced subjection to the Father as His equal.[7] This is the difference between ontological
and functional subordination; a wife is a partner with her husband who follows
his lead. There’s nothing new in modern
feminism,[8] and
Scripture rejects that regressive notion and replaces it with a better way.
Incidentally, this is why Scripture calls for male
leadership not only in the home, but also in the church. Paul follows 1 Timothy 2 with 1 Timothy 3,
and he applies only masculine language to pastors/elders. He doesn’t do that because women are
incapable of leading (there were women judges and prophetesses in Scripture),
but because it speaks of the created order.
As we’ve departed from that order, we’ve seen all manner of marriage difficulties
as well as gender confusion in our culture.
Men and women are equal, but God calls men in particular to get off
their rears and lead.
Does this mean that women should obey their husbands without
question? Of course not! Only God is owed our unquestioning
submission, not husbands or even governing authorities. There’s a long tradition of godly civil
disobedience in Scripture, so a wife would do well to lovingly but firmly tell
her husband no when he demands
something sinful of her. Sometimes an Abigail
is married to a Nabal (1 Sam. 25). Keep
in mind that the wife submits “as to the Lord,” and that the point of her
submission is “that the word of God may not be reviled.” Therefore, there is a godly and worshipful
manner in which a woman submits to her husband.
That brings us to the final point:
Sixth, Women Disciple the Next Generation to Honor
God’s Word (v. 5f)
so that the word
of God will not be slandered.
The term here can be “dishonored” (NASB). The term “blasphemed” is a more literal term (NKJV,
KJV). The question Paul has here, and
the woman of God should have, is whether God’s Word will be maligned by her
behavior.
A young woman’s life should be framed in such a way as to
not bring harm or injury to the Bible’s reputation. The submission of women was important to
Grecian and Roman societies, though they often misapplied it. If women in the church showed no love or
respect for their husbands and children in the name of newfound Christian
freedom, they would invite ridicule upon God’s Word.
Conclusion
I hope you celebrate the women who have discipled you — biological
mothers, spiritual mothers, older sisters. We thank God for the Loises and Eunices, for the
Priscillas, and for every faithful woman who has poured herself out for the
next generation.
To our older women: the church needs you. Your experience, your wisdom, your gentle
instruction is irreplaceable. Will you
step into this Titus 2 calling? We have
a growing women’s ministry which will help you to do just that, and we have
some training materials we can put in your hands. The home and the church are counting on you.
To our younger women: seek out an older woman who loves the
Lord. Welcome her instruction and her
invitations for coffee rather than just tea. You are not alone in the challenges of
marriage, motherhood, or Christian maturity.
To the men: help champion the women in this work and
consider how we also must disciple the next generation. Disciple your own sons and the younger men. We will also have training materials for you
to help you get started soon.
Let’s commit afresh to the life-changing work of
discipleship. May the Lord raise up a
generation of mothers and mentors who disciple faithfully — so that our homes
are strong, our church is healthy, and the word of God is honored in the valley.
[1] Wuest, K. S. (1997). Wuest’s word studies from the Greek New Testament: for the English
reader (Tt 2:3). Grand Rapids: Eerdmans.
[2] John MacArthur Jr., Ed., The MacArthur Study Bible, electronic ed., (Nashville, TN: Word
Pub., 1997), 1886.
[3] Earl D. Radmacher, Ronald Barclay Allen, and H. Wayne
House, The Nelson Study Bible: New King
James Version, (Nashville: T. Nelson Publishers, 1997), Tt 2:4.
[4] A. T. Robertson, Word
Pictures in the New Testament, (Nashville, TN: Broadman Press, 1933), Tt
2:4.
[5] Thomas D. Lea and Hayne P. Griffin, 1, 2 Timothy, Titus, The New American
Commentary, (Nashville: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1992), 34:301.
[6] John M. Frame, Salvation
Belongs to the Lord: An Introduction to Systematic Theology, (Phillipsburg,
NJ: P&R Publishing, 2006), 91.
[7] Ibid., 92.
[8] MacArthur, 1886–1887.